


dissatisfied

by babyboyxu



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: FTM, binder pain (?), kinda angst changkyun, sortof comfort, trans male changkyun, trans!changkyun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2019-12-27
Packaged: 2021-02-18 07:48:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21990727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyboyxu/pseuds/babyboyxu
Summary: changkyun was tired of living life the way he did, but kihyun was there to comfort him, even if it was for a fleeting moment
Relationships: I.M/yoo kihyun, changkyun/kihyun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	dissatisfied

changkyun was tired. 

as soon as he had placed his bag onto the floor of his living room, he unbuckled the uncomfortable binder he had on. it had been restricting his breathing throughout the day but , hey, what could he do ? despite it being so tight and unpleasant, it made him look barely passable. 

he took a deep breath and felt the pain that had been digging into his ribs slowly fade away- not completely, but enough that it wouldn’t hurt if he didnt move too vigorously.

changkyun wondered why his nights always had to be filled with dissatisfaction, melancholy; he wondered why he couldn’t have just been born with a penis, wondered why whatever powerful figure out there had to make his life so difficult. 

changkyun was tired. he was frustrated, he wanted to scream and tear things apart, but he had no energy to. he knew that complaining to anyone willing to listen wouldn’t change anything, his problem wouldn’t solve itself. not in a million years. 

as changkyun’s thoughts were the only thing he could comprehend at the moment, he didn’t notice kihyun entering the room. kihyun sat next to changkyun on the couch- an old raggedy fabric couch they had bought when they first moved in- and looked at changkyun, hoping to get some conversation out of him. 

but converse they did not; changkyun imagined himself venting his frustrations to kihyun, imagined himself giving into his impulses and thrashing the entire apartment, but he knew how tired he would be, how tired he was. so he just stared. stared into nothing, he let kihyun wrap his arms around him in an attempt to comfort him. and it did, for that moment. it wouldn’t comfort him in the long run, nothing would, changkyun had come to believe that his life was hopeless and that he had no future. but in that moment, he was comforted; he was fine. 

they took their lives one moment at a time, what’s the point of worrying about the future when they could just. not

**Author's Note:**

> hi this was my first post i hope u liked it 🥺🥺


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